Hey there, I'm Ali. I'm 20 years old. I love to write and read and draw and paint and listen to music much too loudly, as long as it gets me away from where I am.

 

we’re playing a very dangerous game of touching
don’t get addicted to my thereness
no matter how much it soothes you
I promise that platonically sleeping in your bed together
will not cure your loneliness 
and just because I seem to have places to stay
doesn’t mean I’ve cured my homelessness
I told you that I’ve been spreading myself thin
over these people
because it seems more reliable 
to only be cared about temporarily 
but I’ve never met a sheet 
that hasn’t been crumpled and kicked to the foot of the bed 
and that’s what worries me
and the fact that this has happened before—
when people shake my hand for the first time
can they immediately tell I’m a professional bookend?

culture-heroes:

some sappy sad thought provoking shit
Schenley Drive Bridge, Pittsburgh

just bringing this one back

culture-heroes:

some sappy sad thought provoking shit

Schenley Drive Bridge, Pittsburgh

just bringing this one back

I’ve been anxiously refreshing my email for DAYS because of this poetry contest

love how this happens, love it

I always feel really good on the days that I can eat my lunch of a pb&j and an apple outside of Cathedral and enjoy the sunshine

I need to get off work for the outdoors club trips

I NEED TO

THEY ARE VITAL TO MY EXISTENCE

hey ask me questions because I can’t sleep

fuck now I can’t stop writing in poetry

I need to flip back to creative non-fiction mode

When it is but it aint


Some of us love badly. Sometimes the love is the type of love that implodes. Folds in on itself. Eats its insides. Turns wine to poison. Behaves poorly in restaurants. Drinks. Kisses other people. Comes back to your bed at 4am smelling like everything outside. Asks about your ex. Is jealous of your ex. Thinks everyone a rival. Some of us love others badly, love ourselves worse. Some of us love horrid, love beastly. Love sick love anti light. Sometimes the love can’t go home at night, can’t sleep with itself cannot contain itself, catches fire, destroys the belly, strips buildings, goes missing. Punches. Smashes heirlooms. Tells lies. The best lies. Fucks around. Writes poems, impresses people. Chases lovers into corners. Leaves them longing. Sea sick. Says yes. Means anything but. Tricks the body. Kills the body. Dances wild and walks away, smiling.